Things in my head

Scary I know...the things that go around in my head. I have gotten alot of stuff organized around here lately and I have gotten my house back on track. My house, not my home. My kids are still disobeying, they argue, they throw fits and I get really really mad. I get so frustrated that there are days that I ask God "WHY ME?" But then I turn right around and tell Him I am sorry and ask Him to please let me learn patience and let me show my kids that I love them and that they really do mean the world to me.

I have read several blogs in the last few months in which the authors are being very real. I have always been very afraid to be completely real on here. Afraid of what people will think and what they will say about me. But I can't deny that my life is crazy and hectic and that there are days when I really want to throw it all up in the air and go to work and put my kids in school. But those are the days too that something really good happens or they make me laugh and I immediately say I'm sorry and renew my resolve and my purpose of rearing my kids in a loving Godly environment. Which means I can't yell and scream.

It is getting better though these past couple of weeks. I had a thought hit me one day....(yeah they do that just hit me all of a sudden).... I have been looking at Character Training sites. I have found several as I am sure you all know. I have found the many characters of honesty, obedience, kindness and so on....I want to teach my kids love first. I want to teach them about the love that God has for them. I believe that if you teach them about the Love of God first, that honesty and obedience and kindness will all come easier and in their own time. 1 Cor. 13:13 says that the greatest of these is Charity (love). If I dont have Love, It is harder for me to have faith, hope or patience.

This all may sound a little crazy to alot of you but this is what has went through my head the last couple of weeks. Just more on how to teach my kids. I had all but given up hope and then the thought came to me that I have to teach them love first. The rest will fall into place. So that is our journey right now. That is what I'm praying for, is guidance in loving my kids in a way that they will learn to love.

I also have stuff going on in my head about my husband. He is such a wonderful man. He has been doing stuff around our house to improve it, He has been doing things to make more money since his job got cut back. We paid off one of our bills the other day. He finished putting my quilting machine together so that I can start quilting. (My way of making extra money). He has been giving me breaks whenever he can. He has been helping me with laundry and cooking since he has been home more. All these things that he doesnt have to do...he is doing. He is so wonderful. We had a guest speaker at Church Sunday so Paul didnt have to preach. He held Jason for most of the service so that I could actually listen to the lesson. He has the talent of being able to listen and hold kids..I dont. He knew this so he held Jason while I got to take in a wonderful lesson. Last night, he grated up my soap for laundry detergent (I usually use an old blender to chop it up but my blender went out a couple of weeks ago and my newer blender I just dont want to use for soap..) but he sat and grated it for me. I am just so filled with love for him.

I am going to be a little busier here in the next few weeks because I have a yard sale to do and I need to start quilting on some quilts that I have already made and see if I can get them sold. I also am going to start doing an online photography course...I havent made up my mind yet which one but I got a new camera the other day and photography is something I have always been interested in and loved doing. I am also going to go ahead and start the girls with school stuff even though I cant order any books right now. I have enough free stuff off of the internet that I can get them started. So between my "school", the girls school, quilting and just everyday life, we are going to be quite crazy around here. Plus, Julie is due to have her baby boy the end of this month and my dad is supposed to have surgery this week. (He may not have it).

Thats what is going around in my head here lately,,,what thoughts are in yours? Do you have days like mine with your kids or do you have yours trained? Are yours older so as you dont have the same problems I do or are they younger? Please let me know. I know it is crazy but sometimes, it feel like I am all alone in this world of unminding and challenging children. I know I am not, but it sure feels that way alot.

Many blessings and prayers your way.
Crystal

**************Side NOTE!******** I have some very good and thought provoking comments on this post. Please read them also as they have helped me and made me think more on this topic. Thank You Kelli and IN Pursuit of His Call *******************

Rain Rain!

Rain Rain Rain.....that is what it has done here for the last 24 hrs. But hey, I'm not gonna gripe....we need it and it beats 105 temps. I want to live somewhere where there is not summer..is that possible. I think I will move to Alaska or somewhere...lol. I love Fall, Winter and Spring......absolutely cannot stand summer.

I was going to post Husband Encouragement yesterday but I got so busy spending time with hubby doing things to our house. We have a list of repairs and organizing things to do and yesterday, alot of our little stuff got knocked off of the list. I will go into more detail later but for right now, I am off to get ready for Church. I am so excited.....Its SUNDAY!!!!!!! God is so Good!

Blessings
Crystal

Catching up!

Finally, I get to catch up on my post. But only because I dont feel like doing anything else right now. I just got back from the dentist (I had two teeth filled) and the numbinb stuff always makes me sleepy and sick to my stomach but I have kids to love and hug on so I am sitting here with them watching a movie and resting. (Hubbys orders!)

Let's see. I left off on Thursday. Well, Friday we were at the archery shoot and were really really busy. My Husband Encouragement (H.E.) for that day was the fact that my dear sweet hubby worked hard all weekend to make some extra money so we could pay off some bills....He takes such good care of us and loves us so much.

Saturday, he told me that I could go shopping for the girls one new outfit apiece and when I got tired, he told me to go back to the motel and get a nap. I did get to go shopping and I got the girls several shirts at the goodwill store (that has to be my favorite goodwill store around...lol). I also got Jason several shirts and some jeans for this winter. Then I got the girls one outfit apiece at Goodys for 60% off. I was so happy.

Sunday, when we got home from the shoot, Paul helped me to unload and start laundry and he went and got a pizza so I didnt have to cook and he fed the dogs and watered them and then came home and we sat down and watched Star Trek.

Monday, he got up at 4:00 a.m. to go to work and get in some extra hours. He also came home and worked on our new project we have going.

Tuesday, he got up at 4:00 again and when he got home, my parents were here to visit so he visited with my dad. He had to go get some stuff for our project so he invited my dad and dads friend to go with him and they had a great time visiting. When he came home, he helped me get the kids in bed.

Wednesday, my dear sweet hubby let me sleep in and he had to go to real estate for a little while but when he got home, he worked some more on our project and he helped me last night with a major catastrophe in the house.

Today, he is doing an extra job to make som extra money. But this morning while Iwas gone to the dentist, he watched the kids and done dishes and laundry! Isnt he sweet! I really think so.

I am still trying to get caught up on everything. It seems like the laundry is never ending and I am also trying to get our school schedule made. I was going to start school at the first of July. As you can probably tell, that did not happen. It seems like one thing right after the other happened to keep us from it. All it was was the devil, I know it and I let him in. I need to focus on God and not let the devil in. I really need to get my schedule made and stick to it. So that is my plan by Monday, to have my schedule, to make sure I am up earlier than the kids, and to stick to my plan.

I hope you all have a blessed Friday and weekend and that your plans are working out.

Blessings
Crystal

I'm Home!

Glad to be home. I am catching up on laundry and STUFF! If you have emailed me I will get back to you in a day or two. I will also try to post my Husband and Kid encouragements tommorow.

We had fun but an archery shoot in August is not all that appealing anymore. It was HOT! TIRING! We did get to see alot of people we havent seen in a while and we did get to eat at our favorite Italian Restaraunt (sp). We only eat there once a year and I had been saving money for it. lol. It was worth it after a hot day outside.

I am off now to go get Jason in the bed (his bed finally he says), take a shower, eat some Wal Mart pizza, and do laundry and watch Star Trek....weve missed that. lol

Blessings..
Crystal

Husband Encouragement!

I have been extremely busy the last two days! We are getting ready for an archery shoot and trying to find all the stuff to go and get packed and everything. But here goes making up for yesterday and for todays.

Yesterday! My husband is the greatest. After he went to real estate, he went by Wal Mart and picked up pizzas so I wouldnt have to cook last night...brought them home and put them in the oven and then we sat down and watched Star Trek! Wasnt that so sweet of him.... :)

Today, we have had a really really busy day! First thing though, he woke me up with kisses....then he took the girls and went to get rid of some scrap metal about 45 minutes away and just left me with Jason who was a little cranky but still peaceful enough for mom to get some quiet time...then when he came home, he went to Wal Mart with me so I wouldnt have to go with three kids in this heat and be all grouchy when I came home....we got through about lunch time and he decided to take me out to lunch! While we were there, we picked up some take out for his parents and took it by on our way home. (his mom (granny darlene) recently had a mild heart attack so we are trying to spoil them as much as possible....lol) Then tonight after he got all of his stuff done, he helped me with dishes and laundry so I could get everything done....

He is the greatest guy I know (besides my dads and our oldest son...lol) But isnt he just so sweet.....

I will be really busy the next few days but if the hotel's internet works, I will try to keep posted. This has helped me so much the last couple of days. I will try to post some positive things about my kids also. It seems if I look at everything in a positive light, it all goes better.

I came across a sticker today. It said "The Task ahead of you is never greater than the power behind you" (or something really really close) Talking about God. Nothing is greater than God and as long as we keep him on our side, it will be okay.

Gotta get in bed now we have an early morning .

Blessings and prayers to all
Crystal
PS THank you for the nice comments! They really keep me going.

Odds and Ends

First of All, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ROSE! My Niece. She is 7 today!

Next I want to share some links with you. I have probably shared some of them before but they are very inspiring to me and on days that have just not been going so well, well, they just help.

Kelli at There is No Place Like Home always has such beautiful things to show. Her garden and crafts are always inspiring to me. Makes me wish I had more time and was more creative.

The Art of Making a Home Joyful has very helpful post on working through day to day issues. She is so real and I cant help but relate to alot of things that happen in her days.

I am always enjoying new and exciting blogs that I stumble across, I may not always remember to bookmark them but I do like to read them.

I have been struggling here lately with my attitude. I have not been very Christlike or a very nice mommy at all. I have been snappy and grouchy and just overall really hateful. I have been doing alot of soul searching and have come to some conclusions. 1) I need to take more time to stop and listen to my kids. Actually hear what they are saying. 2) I need to work on my attitude because until I change mine, theirs isnt very likely to change either. 3) I need to be more positive in every aspect of my life. I just happen to go to Church with a very negative person. I tend to let this affect me and I shouldn't. I should be positive anyway. This one person should not make my entire week bad from one week to the next. There are plenty of positive people at Church. I need to gain from them. 4) I need to encourage my husband more. He is so loving and he deserves all the encouragement I can give him.

There have been more stuggles than just these but I am through focusing on them. I am going to focus on the positive. Like the fact that my daughters are being so thoughtful and caring today, and the fact that my little boy is no longer in his play pen (yeah thats positive...he was tearing it up!) He is now trying to potty train and yes it may take a while but he will get there and then woo hoo no more diapers....lol.

I am going to try to post one encouraging thought a day about my sweet dear hubby. (I may miss a day here and there but I will just post two thoughts the next day...) Todays's thought is the fact that he cleaned out my tub last night so I could soak in it because I had a very long day yesterday. And even though I didnt soak because something came up, the fact is it was the thought that counts. And Tonight, I get to soak...Lord Willing!

Please pray for my sister as she is nearing the end of her pregnancy! Your almost there Julie! I am so excited to see my new nephew.

Please pray for me that I may learn patience and be a more happy and cheerful mother to my kids.

Blessings
Crystal

Daddy

Today is my Daddy's 60th birthday. I always remember growing up we would tease Daddy about how old he was...cause he was just well you know old..lol. Now that I am older though and Daddy is 60, I look back and cherish those years and pray that I will have many more years to enjoy spending time with my him.

My sister wrote a post about her memories of our Dad. He is a very special man. He was always there for us when we needed a shoulder to cry on. He hated seeing us cry and hated when we got upset. He did discipline us when we needed it. I remember when we would do something that we werent supposed to, he would call us in the living room and ask us what we had done and then he would tell us to turn around and he would whip us with his belt...(not beat, never beat. just one swat with the belt.) then he would pull us in for a hug and tell us how much he hated to do that. He did not like to have to get on to us..it always made hime cry. I think he cried harder than we did.

I remember Daddy getting up so early so he could try to be the first one in the woods to get his truck loaded (he was a chip truck driver .....) because if he was the first one in, he would get more loads in which meant more money so we wouldn't go hungry. Rarely ever in the winter time, did he make it home before dark. But come spring and summer, he was usually home and played basketball with us for a couple of hours.

I remember riding on the tractor with him when I was little while he was brush hogging the pasture. Thinking I was everything because my daddy was the greatest. I remember going to feed cows with him and when I got old enough to take over that chore, he would come out and help me bust the bales of hay for them no matter how much he hurt.

I remember when I was in Junior high and high school, after he had to quit driving the truck, Julie played basketball and had to be at practice by 7 in the mornings. The school bus ran at 7 so daddy stayed home with me while mom took Julie to practice. I remember growing so close to Daddy during those years because he would always ask me before I left for school if I needed anything. And we always gave each other a hug and told each other we loved them.

I remember being able to call Daddy anytime we needed anything at school and he would drop whatever he was doing and bring whatever it was to us.

Me being the tomboy of the bunch, and the last girl, got to do alot of outside stuff with him. We went to team ropings, and rodeos, and hauled hay, and went to horse sales and cow sales. We had a lot of time to talk. But Daddy and I didnt talk much. Mostly, we just sat in silence and enjoyed being with each other. But when I did need to talk, he would talk. When I needed to cry, he would hold me.

I remember him telling me when I was crying over a guy(several times in my life) That they werent worth it. I didnt need to be crying over them because they werent worth it. I was better than that. That made me feel so good for my daddy to tell me that I was better than how they treated me.

I know that most important of all, was the feeling that no matter what we did in life, no matter how bad we messed up, we always knew that we could come back home to daddy (and momma) and they would welcome us with open arms and a loving heart. They never told us we couldnt come home. Kind of like our heavenly father, no matter how far away from him we go, he will always let us come back home to his open arms.

Julie thanked daddy for all the things he did for her in her life. I have alot of the same memories. Teaching us to play basketball, teaching us to play jacks...lol. letting us clean his truck on saturdays, taking us to Church on Sunday's, holding us when we hurt, teaching us to ride our bikes....and picking us up when we fell, killing the snake that decided it wanted to live under our tire swing....helping momma teach us how to grow a garden, teaching me how to ride a horse, letting me have to responsibility of the outside chores...to this day, I still love being outside more than in. Teachin me how to drive a four wheeler, and forgiving me when I put dents in it. Thank you Daddy for walking me down the aisle (finally..lol) and for being there when I had my babies. It meant alot just to know you were there. Thank you for being a friend to my husband, he really looks up to you for alot of things. Thank you for worrying about me when I didnt come home on time :) and for when I had to drive in the snow and ice to get to work. And for taking care of me when I was sick. Thank you for teaching me about God and for teaching me to pray.

I just cant say enough about him. But he knows that we love him, he knows that we appreciate all these things. I pray that I have many more years with him. I want my babies to enjoy their Poppy as much as I enjoyed my Daddy. We LOVE YOU POPPY and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I wish i had a scanner, I would post some pictures of our dad and us. Oh well maybe another day.